Decoding the Marriage Matrix: Love, Weddings, and Planning for the Long Haul.
Discover how to plan for a happy long-term marriage with boundless discovery to keep the spark endlessly burning before your wedding day.
Brittany Felice
The Vanderbilt
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Picture this: Love and Marriage 101 is the latest addition to school curriculums, sandwiched right between Pythagorean Theorem and The Causes of the Civil War.
Imagine a world where understanding the heart is as crucial as understanding mitochondria—the powerhouse of the cell.
But alas, when it comes to the subject of love, most of us attend the school of hard knocks often graduating honors in nursing a broken heart.
I'm sure that doesn't give you a case of the warm and fuzzies while your actively planning to say your wedding vows against an immaculate backdrop in front your nearest and dearest.
But as wonderful as it is to plan for your wedding, the thing to keep on mind is the wedding is the opening act of a the movie of your life together.
With divorce rates doing the limbo around 15% annually since disco days, it's high time we pondered more on that takes place after the wedding for years to come and definitely matters most.
Divorce Rates Show More Couples Plan For The Wedding and Not The Marriage.
There are many factors to consider when planning a wedding, but what are the core factors to consider when it comes to planning for your happily ever after post nuptials? This article will share some simple tips to maintain marital bliss beyond the wedding.
Understanding Love Beyond Pop Culture: We highlight the gap in our education and understanding of love, pointing out that while many are well-versed in academic subjects, there's a lack of knowledge about the emotional and spiritual aspects of love. Real-life experiences and deeper emotional connections are often overshadowed by pop culture's superficial portrayal of love.
The Importance of Preparation and Maintenance in Relationships: We draw attention to the discrepancy between the effort put into planning weddings and the lack of preparation for the actual marriage. We advocates for continuous effort, maintenance, and daily choices to nurture and strengthen the bond between partners.
Marriage as a Journey of Growth and Partnership: Lastly we emphasize marriage as an ongoing journey that requires teamwork, mutual support, and the daily decision to choose love. Ultimately marriage as an adventure filled with learning, growth, and the art of staying in love through shared experiences and the ability to navigate life's challenges together.
1: The Misunderstood Mosaic of Love
The Vanderbilt
Here's the kicker: while we can recite the elements on the periodic table, our grasp on love's elements is sketchy at best.
We're all about the biology of attraction but clueless about the chemistry of lasting love. Our playlists are chock-full of tunes that serenade the physical, leaving the emotional and spiritual bonds gathering dust in the corner.
And so, armed with only pop culture's map to navigate the labyrinth of love, we're like amateurs at an escape room—confused, making it up as we go, and secretly hoping for a clue to drop from the ceiling.
2. The Barbie Syndrome
Barbie Movie 2023
Enter the world of cinematic love lessons, where 2023's Barbie flick serves up a slice of reality with its plastic fantastic.
There’s this scene where Barbie drops a compliment bomb on an unsuspecting elder, sparking a moment of profound truth amidst the glitter.
It's like finding a diamond in a sandbox. This scene, a brief but bright beacon, shines a light on the complex dance of perception and reality in the realm of love.
3. Wedding Bells and Alarm Bells
The Vanderbilt
Now, let’s dish about weddings—the grand opening of the love saga. It's the day when couples go all out, spending months, sometimes years, planning an event that lasts less than 24 hours.
Yet, when it comes to the marathon of marriage, the prep time often amounts to a brisk walk to the altar. The wedding is just the appetizer; the main course is the decades of togetherness that follow.
Navigating life's ups and downs together is where the real work begins, and how you handle the hurdles says a lot about the strength and resilience of your bond.
4. The Gospel According to John Legend
Big Top 40
John Legend’s “All of Me” hits different when you’re in the trenches of togetherness. It’s not just a love song; it’s a blueprint for unconditional love.
Embracing every curve, every edge, every perfect imperfection—that’s the secret sauce.
Love is about dancing in the rain, basking in the sunshine, and sometimes, trudging through the mud, together.
5: Love’s DIY Manual
Manika Photography
Giving your all to someone is like assembling IKEA furniture without the manual—it’s intuitive, frustrating, but ultimately rewarding.
It means putting your partner's needs, dreams, and yes, those adorable quirks, at the forefront. It's about making the choice to stick together through the sitcom and the drama parts of your life story.
The wedding? That’s just the season premiere. The real plot unfolds in the day-to-day episodes that follow.
6. The Anatomy of Understanding
The Vanderbilt
Before we pop the champagne and slice the cake, let’s talk about understanding love. Love’s like a Swiss Army knife—it’s got a tool for every situation, capable of building bridges or tearing them down.
When you say “I do,” you’re not just taking a vow; you’re signing up to be the guardian of your partner’s heart, mind, and Netflix preferences.
Embracing this role is like becoming a superhero, where your power is your ability to nurture, protect, and occasionally save the day.
7. Maintenance Is Key
The Vanderbilt
Imagine your relationship as a classic car—it’s beautiful, it’s precious, and boy, does it require maintenance. You wouldn’t dream of skipping oil changes or ignoring that check engine light, right?
The same goes for your relationship. Regular check-ins, tune-ups, and the occasional deep clean (we’re talking heart-to-hearts, not just vacuuming under the sofa) keep the engine running smoothly.
8. Choosing Love, Daily
The Vanderbilt
Here’s the thing about marriage: it’s a subscription service, not a one-time purchase. You’re signing up for daily deliveries of patience, understanding, and yes, love.
Renewing your vows isn’t just a ceremony for the silver-haired set; it’s something you do every day, in big ways and small.
From brewing their favorite coffee in the morning to holding hands in the movie theater, it’s the little choices that add up to a lifetime of love.
9. The Team Sport of Marriage
The Vanderbilt
Think of your relationship as the ultimate team sport. There are no opponents, just challenges to face together. Whether you’re dealing with the leaky faucet of daily annoyances or the hurricane-force winds of major life changes, the goal is to keep passing the ball back and forth, supporting each other, and moving forward, together.
10. The Journey Continues
Timecut Photography
As you navigate the wilds of marriage, remember that every day is an opportunity to learn, to grow, and to choose each other anew.
The path isn’t always smooth—there are potholes, detours, and occasional roadblocks—but with humor, heart, and a healthy dose of patience, you can make it an adventure of a lifetime.
Epilogue: The Art of Staying In Love
The-art-of-relationships.com
In the end, staying in love is an art form, a skill honed over years of shared experiences, laughter, and tears. It’s about embracing the messiness, the beauty, and the unpredictability of life together. So here’s to love, marriage, and everything in between.
May your journey be filled with love stories worth telling, moments worth cherishing, and, above all, a partnership that grows stronger with every passing day.
If you're ready to delve even deeper into the art of staying in love and discover how to elevate your chances of creating a loving marriage that endures, psychotherapist Jocelyn Ortega walks you through the steps of how to nurture and navigate your most important relationship in her book The Art of Relationships.
Drawing on years of experience and research, the book offers practical advice, heartfelt stories, and transformative exercises designed to deepen your understanding of one another and fortify your bond. Inside you'll discover a treasure trove of wisdom on communication, conflict resolution, intimacy, and the little things that make a big difference in a lasting relationship.
Available on Amazon Kindle for only $7.97 this short book is a speed read to better understand yourself and your partner. It provides both couples just beginning your journey together or those looking to rekindle the flame of a longstanding union, the exact roadmap to a healthier, happier partnership.
Engaged couples who book a tour at The Vanderbilt at South Beach—will receive a complimentary copy of "The Art of Relationships." Just mention "Wedding Anatomy" during your visit to claim your free copy.
Don't just dream of the perfect wedding; lay the foundation for a marriage that thrives. Book your tour today and embark on the first step towards a lifetime of love and understanding, with "The Art of Relationships" as your guide.
Click below to schedule your tour and claim your free copy of the book that's changing couples' lives—one page at a time. We can't wait to be part of your love story, starting today!
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